Ice Age

Caveman Brought the Ice Age to San Francisco This Week...

Good news, Bachelor fans...viewership ticked up this week.  7.4 million viewers watched the Bachelor on Monday night--good for 4th place behind "Betty White's 90th Birthday" (NBC - 13.9 million); "How I Met Your Mother" (CBS - 10.1 million); and Alcatraz (FOX - 10.1 million).  That was 200,000 more viewers than week's episode - "Sonoma Man."

Frankly, I was more interested in this episode because I was interested to see who the "Mystery Woman" was that would bring us (you guessed it...) "the most dramatic Rose Ceremony ever."

Unfortunately, I didn't get to see the episode on Monday because our DVR misfired...oops!  But I'm not about to let a minor detail like missing the episode prevent me from recapping it.  After all, there are millions of my readers at least two of my readers who depend on me to watch so that they don't have to!  =o)

San Francisco

Caveman's Better Half...His Sister Julia

We get it.  San Francisco is a great town.  Caveman lives there.  It's beautiful there.  And "the only way to see San Francisco is to see it with [Caveman]."

Actually, I'm not so sure about that last part.  That was a quote from Nicki and I liked her, so I thought that she was smarter than that.  Somehow, I think millions and millions of people have managed to see San Francisco without Caveman, but I'm glad that Nicki is reminding us how easy it is to fall in love with the Caveman/Bachelor.

Obviously, Caveman's sister Julia got the brains in the family.  She kept it real by asking if there were any girls that mom would love right away or that she would love right away.  Caveman assured her that there were "quite a few."  He then named Lindzi, Kacie B., and....Courtney?

Yes, Courtney is a girl that every caveman would love to take home to mom.  Caveman then listed all of Courtney's redeeming features.  It took four words, mom would love her because: "she is a model."  It kinda makes me wonder what time of mom Caveman had?

But Caveman then added that he "thought" (I know, I know...kind of a risky proposition in and of itself there) that Julia and Courtney "would totally hit it off."

Julia's response, without missing a beat, made me like her even more: "Really?  Why?!"  I laughed out loud.

"That Thing You Do" - Courtney's Signature Pose...

When Julia didn't seem quite convinced about Courtney, Caveman then was quick to add that "there are some smart girls [in the group.]"  I give him credit at least for not including Courtney in that bunch.

Bay Bridge

Emily...One of the "Smart Ones"

One of the secret formulas for Bachelor success is to craft an "extreme date" and then send the one contestant who has a phobia of that activity.  Since the first date was to climb the Bay Bridge, Mike Fleiss and the producers dug through the contestant profiles to find the one contestant who was afraid of heights and send her on the date.

Emily...come on down!

Climbing on the Golden Gate Bridge

Okay, this picture isn't actually from "The Bachelor"--it's from a movie I watched last night--Rise of the Planet of the Apes.  But both featured primates climbing on a big bridge in San Francisco.  You get the idea.

We all know the formula:  (1) contestant hates heights; (2) contestant goes on the bridge; (3) contestant panics and the adrenaline surges; (4) contestant and the Bachelor share a kiss; (5) contestant conquers her fears with the Bachelor's help; and (6) love blossoms.  It's great television!

But no, this wasn't Jake and Vienna (Snausage) hanging off the side of a bridge during their bungee jumping date from a few years ago (although it might as well have been)--this was Emily and Caveman.  Two different set of people.  Same diff.

The part I liked better was the "official" bridge guy telling Emily and Caveman how dangerous this activity was and that it "wasn't Disneyland."  He also informed them that they were on an "official Cal-Trans climb."  What the heck???

What was the "official" Cal-Trans state business that they were doing up there???  I can only guess that the State of California is so desperate for money that we are now "officially" raffling off climbing inspections to tourists and Hollywood producers to make sure that potholes all over the state get repaired.  I guess I should be glad that the money is coming from the Bachelor and not my pocket in the form of higher taxes!!

Understatement of the Night:

• Caveman to Ph.D. Emily at the end of the date: "I think you're probably smarter than I am." 

Really Caveman?  How long did it take you to figure that out?

The Group Date aka The Ice Age

This Does Look Fun!

So Caveman took the women snow-skiing in San Francisco.  Except that the catch was that everyone had to go skiing in their bikinis.  It made for some interesting reactions from some of the spectators.  Although, I'm sure that some of the poor neighborhood kids got a little more than they bargained for...

Apparently, the producers thought the skiiers were still too over-dressed at this point...

....This guy didn't seem to mind though.

I have to give my sister credit for spotting this guy on the porch steps.

The "Rendezvous"
Props again to my sister for noticing that Caveman has begun referring to his one-on-one dates as a "rendezvous."  It didn't dawn on me when he first muttered it how crass that really sounds.  This season really is going for the lowest common denominator.

Brittney (remember Granny?) gave up her "rendezvous" with Ben because she was raised well by her mom and by Granny.  She chose to go home instead.  I respect her even more for that decision.

Lindzi got the date instead.  Despite getting the first impression rose, she has been feeling pretty insecure since she hasn't gotten another date yet--even though it's only episode 3.  Hang in there Lindzi...there's still a long way to go this season.

The Mystery Woman

Back from the Dead?

So the mystery woman that has been teased all week was Shawntel.  Apparently, she and Caveman had exchanged pleasantries, letters, and/or emails at some point in time and she thought that there was some chemistry there.  I give her credit for coming on the show to figure it out.

Needless to say, the other contestants were livid.  Particularly Courtney.  Even though she's a model, she apparently doesn't like competition.  Courtney threatened to turn down the rose if Caveman gave a rose to Shawntel.

What I don't get is why they care so much.  It's only Episode 3 ladies!  You can't have much of a connection with Caveman yet--especially if you've never been on a date with him!

The Rose Ceremony
Here it is in a nutshell...Courtney accepted her rose, but did give Caveman a speech that made him think twice about giving a rose to Shawntel.

Erika--our favorite (ok the only) law student--did her best Jenna (remember her, the love blogger?) impersonation and actually fainted during the Rose Ceremony.

3 Women...1 Rose...

It came down to three women vying for one rose.  Erika recovered enough to stand upright.  Caveman expressed his feelings for all of them--which didn't take very long and then...

Caveman withheld the rose!  Yes, he stiffed all three of the remaining women!

I'm not sure how they took it, because my DVR crapped out, but the only person who could've been happy was Courtney (maybe I should just call her The Model from now on).

It certainly didn't make the viewers happy.  Shawntel showed more personality than most of the other stiffs left in the show and it would have been fun to see if there was anything between her and Caveman.  I guess we'll have to wait until the next Bachelor Pad when Caveman (fresh off of being dumped by whatever girl he ultimately chooses) and Shawntel can explore their feelings for each other (again) on national television!

See you tonight!