So Long December

It truly has been a long December...Happy New Year!

Back Behind the Wheel

Mr. Toad's Wild Ride

My Christmas "break" this year reminded me a lot of the classic Disneyland attraction "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride."  I think that the amusement park ride is based on a book called "The Wind in the Willows", but the ride is located just on the other side of Sleeping Beauty's castle and it totally old-school, but really fun.  If you haven't been on it, you need to try it next time you visit the Magic Kingdom.

I already blogged about "The Vomit Comet."  Here's a quick recap:  R. started yakking the night before J. drove to Arizona.  Then during, the ride S. started barffing.  Then, not to be outdone, E. followed suit.  When J. got out of the car to clean E. up, J. picked up E. and E. promptly ralphed all over J.  Fun times!

Then, J. got sick the day after they got there.  Our Christmas Vacation was off to a great start!

My drive was perhaps just as wild--minus the puking.

I started off by managing to injure myself before I even left the house.  In short, I had an accidental run in with the refrigerator.  The fridge is fine, but I wasn't so lucky.  Yes, I drew blood and yes, it left a mark.  The details are too embarrassing to document.  Fortunately, I didn't have to go to the E.R. for stitches, mostly because I didn't want to spend Christmas Eve hanging out at the hospital.

Not something you want to mess with...

Once I actually got on the road, I had a near miss on the highway.  Somewhere on a two lane stretch of I-10, in the middle of the Arizona desert, I found myself in the blind spot of a double trailer semi-truck (see above).  The semi and I were both doing about 80 mph.  Unfortunately, the semi had a pick up truck towing a fifth wheel trailer in his lane up ahead of him, and as we barrelled toward the trailer toting pickup truck, I realized that the semi was never going to be able to slow down in time to avoid crashing into the fifth wheel.

Nevertheless, the semi slammed on its breaks.  I tried to move to the left to give some extra space for maneuvering to the semi, but I only had half a lane of clearance on the left shoulder of the highway before I would have hit the soft dirt in the median.  I could only pray that the semi wouldn't swerve to the left and take me out to avoid a fiery collision that would imperil the family that was towing the trailer.

Since I wasn't driving my Ferrari on this trip, there was no way I could accelerate out of the danger zone.  I was surprisingly calm as I became a spectator.  My fate was sealed and there was literally nothing that I could do to change it.

Finally, at the last possible second, the semi swerved to the other side of the pickup truck and trailer and flew past them on the right shoulder of the highway.  Great clouds of dust and dirt got kicked up, but all were spared.  I still don't know how the driver of the semi pulled it off, but I am grateful!  It truly was an answer to prayers!

No Room in the Inn

I got safely to Arizona only to find that our family, in the spirit of the Christmas holidays, had decided to re-enact the Nativity at my in-laws' house.  Since there weren't enough beds for everyone, my family decided to put a modern, Survivor-like twist on this traditional story and "voted out" one family member since there wasn't enough "room in the inn."

The end result was that J. and the kids got to take the bed in the bedroom and "Joseph" got to take the floor in front of the Christmas tree.  All I can say is that once Santa delivered his presents, I made sure that they were safely guarded.

Best move of the trip:  Remembering to bring my own pillow, sheet, and blanket so that the sleeping accommodations were somewhat comfortable.  An Eagle Scout is always prepared!

'Twas the Night Before Christmas

I finished reading "The Help" on the trip.  The book was awesome!  It came as a total surprise, so thanks to everyone that recommended it!  (Kaari, I'm still waiting on your report on your two bios that you were reading over the break...)

I was so excited to see the movie after reading the book that I had to force myself not to go rent it before I finished the book.  All I can say is that after reading the book, the movie was a letdown!  (I actually have to finish watching the movie, since I fell asleep somewhere in the middle.)

It's probably unfair to compare the movie to the book, but I think it actually says more about how much I liked the book rather than vice versa.  I actually think that the movie was good, but the book was great--head and shoulders better.  I guess that's pretty much how it usually is...

Silent Night
I don't know how "silent" the nights were (especially when E. decides to get up in the middle of the night and tried to kick me out of my sleeping accommodations so that she could watch Dora the Exploradora), but there was plenty of stuff going on.  The kids loved being with their AZ cousins.  We had family parties, family dinners, family get-togethers--lots of quality time with the family and extended family.

We also saw saw a couple of movies...somehow I managed to survive the latest Alvin and the Chipmunks offering ("Chipwrecked"???).  I would have been much more bitter except for the fact that the kids really did seem to love it and somehow we got the whole family into the theater for about $15 bucks, so that took some of the sting out of it.

Best movie of the break (in a theatre): Sherlock Holmes (Game of Shadows???  I'm really testing my memory here trying to come up with these movie names).  It was really good, even though if you blink you're sure to miss some important detail!  Thanks to Amy and Scott H. for going with us to see it.

I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas

Well, it wasn't a white Christmas, but it sure was a cold one!  Maybe it was because I constantly felt like I was about to come down with a cold.  Maybe it was because I packed like I was going to Arizona in the middle of the summer.  But I can tell that there is currently no evidence of global warning in the greater Phoenix-Mesa metropolitan area.  I couldn't have picked a worse time to omit my cold weather gear from my packing list!  Next time, I really need to be "more" prepared!

Feasts For Us--But No Festivus
We ate well at the holiday events.  The food, desserts, and company was so, so good!

Also fun was the chance to finally eat at a Waffle House.  I've been wanting to try it ever since I read a book written by a former Waffle House employee about a year ago.  I took the boys and they really had a good time too!

The boys loved the grits!  Yes, we are that classy...

(If anyone is looking for an interesting, really funny read about the roots of our current financial crisis, I highly recommend "Waffle Street.")

I'll Be Home For Christmas
Fortunately, after all the trauma and drama, blood and guts, sickness and health, and fun and excitement, the drive home was almost completely uneventful.  Our trip was a wild ride, but still fun and we were very grateful to get home safe and sound!

If you're still traveling this holiday season, please be alert out there and drive safely!!  :)

Back on the Home Front

One of our family traditions is to play Santa Bingo.  Everyone looks forward to it and it is one of the highlights of the extended family Christmas traditions.  Typically Santa Bingo is played on a night between Christmas and New Year's Eve.  My mom makes an effort to pick the night that is most likely to maximize attendance.

The rules of Santa Bingo are simple.  Everyone gets a bingo card.  When you get a "BINGO" you get a prize.  The prizes are usually from the Dollar Store and can range from $20 bills to hair accessories to scarves to hats to cans of soup.  You can either pick a new bag (prizes are kept in brown paper bags) or steal a prize that someone else has already opened.

This round is just getting underway...

Once a prize has been stolen twice (i.e. it gets to its third "owner") the prize is retired and can't be stolen again.  Each round goes until pretty much everyone gets a bingo and then the cards are cleared and the next round starts.

If there is any criticism of Santa Bingo, it is that the games can seemingly go on and on and on.  I don't know when my mom starts shopping for prizes, but it must be months in advance because there are literally dozens and dozens (if not hundreds) of brown paper bags containing the soon-to-be "spoils."

Also, people get excited to bring additional prizes for the game, which only adds to the booty (and the fun!).

This may have been a Santa Bingo game that went horribly wrong...

Santa Bingo lasts so long that it reminds me of some of the scenes from the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland--lots of loot and lots of sitting at the table!  Santa Bingo games have been known to extend late into the night and to even be stretched over two or three days!

"Yo-Ho, Yo-Ho, Santa Bingo's the game for me..."

This year, we divided Santa Bingo in half.  The adults played last night and the grandkids played tonight.  Everyone had a great time, even the guests that showed up to play.

Mom, thanks for making this just one of the fun family traditions that make me love coming home for the holidays!

Does anyone else get into the Santa Bingo madness for the Christmas holidays?  What fun holiday traditions do your families have each year?

My Christmas Wish List

Jolly St. Nick

It's Christmas Eve!  If you have read my blog, I appreciate it very much.  And if you have taken a moment to comment on my blog, I appreciate it even more!  =o)

Because Christmas is a time of giving, I thought about doing something to show my gratitude to you for reading and commenting on my blog.  Initially, I considered a giveaway, but I wasn't really sure that I had anything that was "give-away worthy."

I always say that I know my readers--all five of you!  And for those of you that are related to me, I already have your gift ready to go.  But in reviewing my blog comments, I realized that I've had a few more than five people comment so far this year.  

I wanted to get something for each of my readers for Christmas, so since a Nordstrom gift card for each of you is out, here's my Fantasy Christmas Gift/Wish List for each of you (aka what I would give you if my dad were Bill Gates!)  =o)

Amy, now that you have your college degree, I hope that you inspire all of your kids to each get their own degree.  And I'd hire someone to help you free up some time to come up with some more posts for all of us to read and enjoy!

 What do you give the best pre-school teacher in California?  I'd start with a crystal apple...

And then probably send over a plate of Tito's Burritos, since I owe you some anyway!

Andrea and The DeVito's, my Christmas wish for you is that you have more friends like Brooke.  Though I realize that that's a pretty tall order to fill.

Definitely not a dustbuster...I hear you're all stocked up on those!  ;)

Always handy!

Instead, you get your very own badge for your web site, you deserve it! 

UPDATE:  I actually had one more badge for your "collection."  This badge proves that there truly were no losers in this contest!

I hope Kaari's not jealous!  ;)

An iPad wireless keyboard...so you don't have to worry anymore about the iPad's $%#$! auto-correct feature, of course!

And assuming you ever figure out how to turn off the auto-correct (and won't need the keyboard), I'd "give-a-give-a-give-a-give-a-give-a Garmin" to you.

Since you're a stay at home mom who is rarely home, there's no reason not to equip your minivan (aka "garbage can on wheels") with the latest technology.  A GPS unit will change your life (for the better!)...

To have Costco build a new store near you on the Sunshine Coast of Oz.  Otherwise, I would have said something like this:

if only the shipping to Oz didn't cost thousands of dollars!!!

 The chance to meet a few more of your blogging friends in person in 2012.

That you love your new house as much as you loved the Grandma House.  :)

Don't worry, I think Lancer was taking the picture

Donnie W. with one members of the Osmond Clan

The opportunity to finally meet Donnie W. in person!  

 Yet another Raytheon League Basketball Championship!

 A year's worth of free airline passes to visit your kids and grandkids (but also fully transferable so that they can use them to come visit you)!

 The chance to enjoy your new house without having to travel for a bit.

You are so beautiful inside and out and every time I see you, you look more and more like your mom.  I love that you are more like a sister to me than a cousin!  My Christmas wish for you would be for you to be able to spend more time bonding with your cute sisters up there in Utah Valley.

A kitchen remodel and a Caribbean cruise with Dad!

A triumphant return to the Turkey Trot in 2012...this time with Lance running alongside with Jacob in the jog stroller.

That you get your new house decorated cute and that our family gets a chance to visit you guys for a change!

Your dream job with your new degree.  Ideally somewhere close to where we live so that we can see you more often!

Straight A's this semester and a fun NCAA tournament run for BYU's basketball team!  Plus that you like the stuff we "really" got you for Christmas this year!

Merry, Merry Christmas!!!

I Got Caught...

I often say that I know all five of my readers.  But there are a lot of people that don't read my blog--even among my family.  One of those non-readers is my wife J.  I once finished a post that I was kind of excited about, hit the "publish" button, and then handed her my laptop and asked her if she wanted to read it.

She said "No" and handed the laptop back.  True story.

One of my favorite posts of my blog so far was my post judging a Thansgiving Display-Off contest that some friends of mine did.  I think J. was just confused when she read it.  She probably wasn't even sure that I actually wrote it!  (That's okay even if she doesn't read my blog though--she has her hands full dealing with more important issues.  =o)

So when I wrote in my "Gift of the Magi" post that I still had one more gift to get for my wife, I felt like I was safe and that J. wouldn't read it until after Christmas.  I wasn't...I got caught!

Here is what I found in my email box early this morning...It was an email from J. to me.

A not-so-subtle hint...

So, like any good husband, I took the hint and decided to check it out.  Here, I'll save you the trouble:

These boots are made for walkin'...

Anyway, I went to the trouble of stopping at Nordstrom on my way in to work this morning, but they are out of stock.  (I left so quickly, however, that I forgot my credit card, so I'll have to stop by again later to pick it up!)

I give J. credit with this suggestion, however, for a couple of reasons...first, I think that they look good (not that I would ever doubt her taste in fashion...).  Second, they are half off right now (I know, I know, don't you just hate those chintzy 40% off sales!)  J., your ability to spot such a great sale in particular makes me especially proud!  =o)

So I'm going to double-down and say that I bet J. will not read this post before Christmas and that the secret of  her "one last" Christmas gift is safe until then.

J., if you do read this before then, I've ordered these and they'll be waiting for you when we get back from Christmas Vacation!  (There was no way to get them here by Christmas...)  You deserve these for being such a great wife and mom--not to mention surviving the drive on a trip that may be remembered in family lore as the "Vomit Comet."

Merry Christmas Eve Eve!

Back to Mesa

Sometime in the next 24 hours, I will be driving to Mesa, Arizona to pass the Christmas Holidays with the in-laws.  I think I'm contractually obligated to make this pilgrimage at least once every quadrennial.  It's a little known, but important, technicality that comes when you marry a Mesa girl.

Fortunately, I love J.'s family and I also love Mesa.  And I have a lot of family there.  It's one of those places that I wish I had the chance to visit more often.  And whenever I'm there, I feel like there's never enough time to do everything that I'd like to do.

The drive out should be fun, even though I will have to do it by myself.  I hope to avoid the bouts of "projectile vomiting" that have beset our family this week.  Wednesday night, J. went to go see "Wicked" in Los Angeles with a friend.  I got home from work and had just paid the babysitter when one of my kids came running downstairs to announce that my oldest son had just had a barf attack upstairs.

Cleaning it up was a lot of fun.  As I surveyed the scene, I felt a bit like a CSI investigator and wondered how my child had managed to get it everywhere but the bowl, the sink, or the porcelain fixture.

The next day, J. and the kids drove to Mesa without me because I had to work.   :(  R. was feeling a lot better and slept the whole way.  Our second son, however, got hit with the bug and managed to "yak" (not "yuk") it up about an hour into a six hour drive.  Then E., the youngest got it too.  J. pulled over to clean up E.'s mess and E. managed to promptly  spew forth all over J.  Let's just say that apparently my kids have no trouble thinking (or throwing up at least) outside of the "box" (or barf bag as it were).

I think J. was pretty relieved when she finally pulled into town!  I told her to just take the car and get it detailed!!  I figured it was the least I could do since she had to suffer through the whole thing on her own!

I'm sure my kids must have felt the Christmas Spirit so much, that they just wanted to give back--in their own special way!  (Just be glad that I decided to spare you the photos...)

I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas...

Anyway, we will be enjoying an Arizona Christmas this year.  It won't be white unless you count the desert sand.  Hopefully it will be warm though!

(And if any of my friends or family in Mesa read this, we're looking forward to seeing you for Christmas!)

Gift of the Magi

Christmas is a time for giving gifts.  Right now, I'm stressed because I have several gifts that I need to buy, including another one for my wife.  (I won't say what I'm getting her on the off-chance that she happens to visit this blog before Christmas.)  My problem is that I'm not sure when I'm going to have a chance to go shopping!  (It's too late to order these gifts online or they weren't available online.)

Last week, we took our Young Men on a Christmas activity to see the Christmas lights in one of the neighborhoods here in Orange County.  It was a bit of a trek to get there, so we had some good quality travel time in the car.

The Young Men from the SC Third Ward Enjoy Candy Cane Lane

On the way back, one of my awesome youths decided to start having people in the car answer questions about Christmas topics.  Somehow, I found myself relating the story: "The Gift of the Magi" by O. Henry to the "captive" occupants of the car.

Della and Jim Young -- our two protagonists

I love to read.  One of my favorite genres is that of the short story.  O. Henry is a master of the short story.   If you haven't read The Gift of the Magi before, you must!  It will only take you about five minutes.

"Young" Love--Della and Jim

Basically, Della and James Dillingham Young are a young married couple.  No kids, but very much in love.  Della has saved all year to get a Christmas present for her husband.  She literally saved pennies at a time (obviously inflation has kicked in a bit since O. Henry wrote the story in 1906!).

On Christmas Eve, however, Della had only managed to save $1.87.  I guess even 100 years ago that couldn't buy very much.

Della decides to chop off her hair (hair that O. Henry describe as being beautiful enough to tarnish the Queen of Sheba's jewels) and sell it to a wig maker to buy a platinum chain for her husband's family heirloom, gold pocket watch.

She knew that as fancy and impressive as the watch was, her husband was sometimes embarrassed to pull it out to check the time because he could only afford a simple leather strap for it.  (Maybe her husband was an attorney (or law student) and had to keep checking the time because his professional life was ruled by the almighty "billable hour."  O. Henry doesn't say, but I digress...)

Della bought the platinum watch chain and it was the perfect gift.  Even though she now looked like a "truant schoolboy" and she did not feel cute at all, she was "intoxicated" with the thought that her beloved "Jim" would love the gift.

Well, Jim got home that night and presented Della with her Christmas gift.  It was a set of beautiful tortoise shell combs for wearing in her hair that Della had "worshipped long in a Broadway window."  Della's "heart had simply craved and yearned over them without the least hope of possession."

(First, I love how O. Henry can say so much in so few words.  He is a literary wordsmith.  Second, as a guy, I have no idea what a set of these combs would even look like or why they would be so expensive.  Were they like berets?  Headbands?  If you have any idea, feel free to help me out here...)

A tortoise shell comb (apparently)....why anyone would use it remains a mystery

The aforementioned set of combs was very expensive.  To pay for it, Jim sold his prized heirloom watch.

And so, both Della and Jim had, quite foolishly, sold their most personal, valuable, and prized possessions to buy a gift for the other that neither would be able to use!  Can't you just feel the irony?

And if that were the end of the story, it would be a great story.  Funny, ironic, and probably soon forgotten in the annals of American literature.

But O. Henry closes with the following paragraph and I think this is what makes the story so enigmatic and enduring--not to mention worthy of our attention during the Christmas season:

The magi, as you know, were wise men--wonderfully wise men--who brought gifts to the Babe in the manger. They invented the art of giving Christmas presents. Being wise, their gifts were no doubt wise ones, possibly bearing the privilege of exchange in case of duplication. And here I have lamely related to you the uneventful chronicle of two foolish children in a flat who most unwisely sacrificed for each other the greatest treasures of their house. But in a last word to the wise of these days let it be said that of all who give gifts these two were the wisest. O all who give and receive gifts, such as they are wisest. Everywhere they are wisest. They are the magi.

But what does this mean?  On a surface level, Della and Jim were certainly young and foolish.  But why would O. Henry say that they were also "wisest...They are the magi."?

I was wrestling with this issue in my mind for a few days and decided to put this question to my Young Men.  I got a very simple, but profound answer from "Paul"--one of my 12-13 year olds.  Paul said that Jim and Della were wise "because Christmas is about giving."

Christmas Is About Giving

The Magi (or Three Wise Men as they are sometimes called) traveled to visit the Baby Jesus.  They brought him gifts of gold, frankincense (a resin from trees used in incense and perfumes), and myrrh (another natural resin used as perfume, incense, and medicine).

These gifts were undeniably costly.  In ancient times, myrrh was worth its weight in gold.  The Magi's gifts were truly gifts fit for a king.

We give gifts at Christmas time in the continuation of the tradition started by the magi--the wise men.  As kids, we loved Christmas because of the joy, anticipation, and excitement that comes from Santa's visit.  As adults, that pure love and joy can get squeezed out in the hustle and bustle of shopping, office parties, and other year end festivities.

But Paul was right.  Christmas is really about giving.  And the best gifts are those the gifts where we give of ourselves.  I think the Magi knew that.

Maybe they could easily afford the gifts that they presented to the Baby Jesus.  But the Magi really gave of themselves in that they gave their time to search the heavens waiting for the star that signaled the birth of the Savior.  And then they traveled to seek Him out.  It could not have been an easy journey.  After finding Him, they were warned in a dream to go home by a different route so that Herod could not find and kill the newborn King of Kings.  They obeyed.  They truly were Wise Men.

The Wisdom of the "Youngs"



Yes, Jim and Della foolishly gave away their two most prized possessions.  But they are the wisest of givers because they gave of themselves.  They cared more about the recipient than they did about themselves.  In their youth and "foolishness," they actually understood that Christmas is about giving.  And they truly did give each other the best gifts.

The miracle of Christmas is that God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten Son to redeem us from our sins.  His gift to the world was perfect.  The Savior's gift to us--eternal life--is likewise perfect--the best gift.

We have been counseled by modern prophets to earnestly seek the "best gifts."  (D&C 46:8).  What better gift to seek than to seek after Christ?  It has been said that "Wise Men Still Seek Him."  At Christmas, we have an opportunity to do just that and to be reminded of the importance of doing that.

Jesus Is The Reason For The Season

The scriptures are replete with examples about giving.  The people of Israel were asked to give their best--the firstborn of their flocks.  They did so, but got so caught up in the technical aspects of their gifts, that they didn't realize that the purpose of their gifts was to foreshadow God's gift to mankind--the Savior Jesus Christ.

Today, it seems as if our society gets so caught up at times in the commercial aspects of Christmas that we forget the true reason for celebrating Christmas.  I admit I have a hard time feeling the true spirit of Christmas when rush around trying to be productive at work, be a dad, get to the store before it closes to do Christmas shopping, and fulfill a church calling.

Even though I'm still stressed about all those things and also about finding the perfect gift for the people on my Christmas List, I am going to look for opportunities to remember and celebrate the true meaning of Christmas this year.