Thursday, December 15, 2011

Back in the Saddle

'Tis The Season...You've been summoned!
My life has been on hold for the past week because of the letter that I got above.  Starting last Friday, I had to call in every day to see if I would need to report for jury duty.  This entire week, I've had to call every day at noon to see if I had to report at 1 p.m.  Fortunately, the court house was about a block away.

Today, I actually forgot to call in right at noon, but when I did call, I was told that my jury service had been completed.  And I didn't even have to set foot inside the courthouse.

Talk about a letdown, but now I'm back in the saddle for the Christmas season and don't have to worry about making a last minute rush down to do my civic duty!

I'm actually disappointed that I didn't get called.  First, I think that serving on a jury duty is an important part of our civic duty.  I think that having good, educated jurors is an important part of our society and our country.  And I'd like to think that I would be a good juror.  I know that I could be fair and impartial.  And even though it is the Christmas season, I do not believe, as some may, that 'Tis the Season to Convict!  (Mostly, I'm sure so that those short-sighted jurors can get home as quickly as possible.)
I probably would convict this guy though...I'm just sayin'
Selfishly, I think being on a jury would be great because I think it would be invaluable to experience the dynamics of the jury room first-hand.  I think that it would only make me a better attorney.  As attorneys, we spent hours agonizing over the jury will react to a witness or a piece of evidence or our client or our own arguments.  It would be great to see that from the (not-so-comfortable) chairs in the jury box.

I've been summonsed for jury duty now three times.  Twice I had to actually go to the courthouse.  I've never even made it up to a courtroom.

Sadly, the reality is that even if I ever did make it into a courtroom, I would probably never make it onto a jury.  I think that most attorneys don't like having other attorneys sit on their juries.  Oh well...

"Johnny Cochrane" Trial Moment
Who can forget Johnny's memorable line from this case?
So I was in court the other day and heard this exchange first hand.  It was so good that I wrote it down:
Attorney: "So she lives at home?"
Witness: "Yes sir."
And then without missing a beat or cracking a smile, the witness added: "We all do!"

It was a pretty funny moment...Yes, attorneys can be dumb sometimes (as my wife will be more than happy to tell you!).  

It was almost as good as this classic exchange:
A defending attorney was cross examining a coroner. The attorney asked, "Before you signed the death certificate had you taken the man's pulse?""No," the coroner replied.The attorney then asked, "Did you listen for a heart beat?"
The coroner said, "No."
"Did you check for breathing?", asked the attorney.
Again the coroner replied, "No."
The attorney asked, "So when you signed the death certificate you had not taken any steps to make sure the man was dead, had you?"
The coroner, now tired of the brow beating said, "Well, let me put it this way. The man's brain was sitting in a jar on my desk, but for all I know he could be out there practicing law somewhere."

5 comments:

  1. I just had a big long comment and blogger lost it. Basically, you and I will never get to serve on a jury because not only are we lawyers, but we are also intelligent and intelligent people convict. Thus defense counsel always boots the intelligent people.

    When I was a prosecutor, I always wanted all the people with college degrees. Defense counsel wanted all the guys with earrings and tattoos. Jeez, I wonder why? And if the case is going to trial, pretty good chance the defendant is guilty or the prosecutor would have settled or dismissed the case.....no wonder I never get picked for juries.

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  2. I have no idea what Johnny Cochrane's famous line was. I was a junior in H.S. when all that happened. I remember names and infamous faces (not just O.J.'s) and watching the verdict, but that's about it.

    I've always thought it would be fun to be on a jury, even though I'd lose money doing it. But your mentioning the uncomfortable chairs gives me serious second thoughts.

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  3. BTW, if you were ever trying to convict Pauly Shore, you would totally have my jury vote.

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  4. Em--

    The correct answer is: "If the gloves don't fit, you must acquit!"

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRth45yU_2Q&feature=related

    Go to 4:40 on the tape...

    Here is what some believe was the "trial moment" of the case. Why oh why did Marcia Clark allow this farce to happen!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2YbY9eYmdM&feature=related

    I missed the whole OJ fiasco because I was in the Republica Dominicana when the murders occurred and when the verdict came down I was stuck in the hospital with little else to do but watch the non-stop coverage.

    It was a little confusing to me since I had missed all of the emotionalism of the murders, the Bronco chase, etc.

    Pauly Shore is guilty of being a terrible actor and not funny. He may be the most annoying actor of the past 20 years!

    Brooke, please tell us how you really feel! And don't hold back! Your cynicism with regard to the jury system is inspiring. :)

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  5. I have been a juror 3 times !!! (We lived in a very small city with a small pool of eligible - read sane people).

    I lost a bit of faith in the system seeing how some peeps weigh up evidence or more correctly convict because they want to go home. I'm all for convicting ... but had a case where the Jury wanted to convict but the prosecution made such a hash of the case we couldn't. It was fascinating but I hope I don't have to do it again.

    PS I do have a tattoo so that proves Brooke's theory right about he peeps who get picked :-)

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