Dance Dance Revolution

I attended my kids' first ever dance recital this afternoon.  I wasn't sure what to expect since I am no dancer.  I am fairly proud of the fact that I pretty much have no moves whatsoever.  After my mission, I tried to take a ballroom dance class at college.  I remember that the "professor" (really some guy on the college ballroom dance team) asked us to write on a little cue card something that made us unique.  I wrote: "I know that I have rhythm because it takes rhythm to dunk a basketball."

I stand by that statement today.  (Have you ever seen someone who is uncoordinated ever be able to dunk?)  However, after my appendix ruptured, I had to spend 10 days in the hospital.  My "professor" told me that I had to spend 2 hours in the dance "lab" for every hour of class that I had missed.  I withdrew from the class immediately and remain stubbornly proud of that "W" on my transcript that is still there to this day.

My Little Princess/Cinderella Getting Ready for the Ball...

E. was so excited for the recital that she got herself dressed and ready.  J. helped her by spending what seemed like hours doing E.'s hair.  E. loved to tell me that she was doing her hair "fancy."  I asked E. if I could do my hair "fancy" too.  She told me no because I wasn't a girl.

Every Princess needs a teddy bear...

The traffic down to the recital as brutal.  It turned what should have been a 30 minute drive into a 70 minute drive.  I have no idea why all those people felt like they should have been on the road.  For a little bit, I worried whether we would make it before the curtain lifted on the show!

Once we got there, J. took E. backstage and I ended up getting a text from J. saying that E. was feeling nervous and might not take the stage.  E.'s number was #8 on the program (out of 29), so we didn't have to wait long.  I had been saying silent prayers in my heart that E. would make it out on stage.

Finally, Performance #8 was due.  The lights went dark and then came up to see a line of little princess dancers.  I quickly scanned them searching for E.  This is what I saw:

One of these dancers is not like the others...

Yes, that is E. on the far right.  No, she did not make it onstage.  I videotaped the whole performance and this is the still frame documenting the exact moment that she was closest to being on stage.  Here's an excerpt from the text that J. sent me to describe what E. was feeling at that moment:

"[E.] was shaking with fear.  Her heart beat was racing.  It was so sad..."

Later, the dance director would proudly inform us that in 25 years of teaching dance she's never had a little girl not make it on stage.  Until tonight that is.  Awesome!  I felt like asking her for a refund!  ;-)

Curiously, E. did not appear to have much stage fright once the lights were on!

I hope that next time it won't be as traumatic for E.  Somewhere, J. has rehearsal footage of E. and J. told me that E. did a really good job.  I believe it!

R.'s Turn:

Practice makes perfect...

R. had number 28 out of 29 on the program.  He looked great, but I was a little bummed because he was on the far side of the stage and also seemed to be kinda stuck in back.  Here's a little clip that I managed to bootleg out of the performance (after I videotaped E.'s performance, the announcer took the PA to "remind" us that we weren't allowed to video the dances--no doubt to make us purchase the DVD later on.  I felt it was unfair for reminding me not to video a performance that my daughter wasn't in--obviously I wasn't going to buy that one later anyway!).

R. is on the far right, but don't fret...I managed to capture this short snippet from his dress rehearsal the night before:

I don't know anything about dance, but I think R.'s moves look great.  And I'm impressed that he's been so enthusiastic about practicing and getting ready.  I take no credit for his success--J. is the real, talented dancer in the family so I'm glad that some of those genes rubbed off on our kids!

Good job R!  I'm really proud of how well you did during the recital today.

I love you two!  And E., next time I promise to remember a bouquet of flowers for you!

*******UPDATE*******
I have it on good authority that if E. had made it onstage, it would have looked something like this:

Good Night, Sweet Princess

"Good Night, sweet prince[ss]/and flights of angels sing thee to thy rest." --Shakespeare's Hamlet
E. is probably dreaming of ballerinas in pink tutus...

Since the day, E. was born, she has slept in a crib.  In a pink room, with a beautiful chandelier fixture, but a crib nonetheless.  Actually, for the past few months, she really hasn't slept in her room or her crib.  She's been sleeping in Mom and Dad's "crib".

J. is over that and I've been getting significant pressure and frequent reminders about how much E. needs a new "Big Girl Bed."  J. had found the perfect one on Amazon and (luckily for me) my new Amazon gift card would cover a big chunk of the purchase price.  (Yay?)

I came home this afternoon to find three large cardbox boxes sitting on my porch.  (Thanks Amazon Prime!!)  I knew instantly what they were.  First, I unpacked the mattress pad.  E. was so excited for it, that I felt guilty and opened the box containing the actual mattress for her.  She was even more excited to lay down on it and was so cute to let her brothers lay on it too.

Then J. left to run some errands and I felt like I really needed to tackle the real project--for E.'s sake (and to pleasantly surprise J.)  Here's how things looked two and a half hours later...

I think someone was excited to finish the project!

Not to brag, but maybe the best part about the project was that I had all 3 of the kids involved at various times.  Not that they did a significant amount of work, but I think that they really liked helping and there were a couple of tricky parts where I really did appreciate having an extra set (or two) of little hands.

Now that this project is over and E. has her long-awaited Big Girl Bed, J. assures me that E. will be mentally ready to lose the diapers and fully embrace her Big Girl Pants.  If J. says it, I believe it, so I'm looking forward to going back to just having one kid in diapers...those things can get pretty expensive!

E. took to her new bed like a duck to water...

Anyway, as I write this E. is sleeping soundly in her new bed.  Seeing her excitement made it worth every minute that it took to put that dang thing together!  Good night, sweet princess!  Sleep tight!

Night Falls in Southern California

My View Right Now

I love summer!  I'm surprised at how well this shot turned out from my iPhone.

The Bachelorette: 101 Dalmatians Edition

Pongo and Perdita

This week's edition of The Bachelorette took us to Dubrovnik, Croatia.  Dubrovnik is a city on the famed coast of Dalmatia--an ancient region in Croatia.  I've actually been to Croatia and it was great to remember the couple of weeks that I spent there.  But I digress, and since this blog isn't "all about me", I'll get back to the task at hand...yesterday's episode.

Emily and Her Remaining Suitors

For better or worse, we don't have 101 "dogs" that Emily has to weed through at this point in the season.  As the episode opens, we are only down to 8 dogs--The Ox (aka Ryan); Horton (the "Egg Guy" from Horton Hatches An Egg aka Travis); Sean; "Wolf" (aka John the paper shredder); Jef with One F; Doug; Chris; and Arie.  

Spectacular!  Dubrovnik lies on the Dalmatian Coast.

***SPOILER ALERT***  By then end of the episode, it became clear to me that there were really only three serious suitors (Arie; Jef with One F; and Sean).  The rest are all dogs.  And I'm still trying to figure out who is playing the role of Cruella de Ville...(It might be the Ox, but I'm not sure that he is smart enough for that role...)

The episode starts with Emily dropping in on the guys in their hotel room.  No sign of Chris Harrison.  I guess he must have been held up in Customs with visa problems.  The guys look mostly like they just got off the red-eye from London.  None of them have shaved.  But Ox's beard looks particularly grown in.  (Later on, we would find out that he waxes his legs and plucks the hair from his fingers.  He also shaves little designs in his beard.  Frankly, it was TMI as far as I was concerned!).

Best line from this portion of the date, was Jef inserting this classic line: "If you're going to fall in love, North Carolina Bermuda London Croatia is the perfect place to do it."  Is it just me or do they say that every single week???

Horton's Date:

Poor Horton/Travis

Horton and Emily decided to tour Old City Dubrovnik.  Emily said that they were both "like two fish out of water."  As luck would turn out, being like two fish out of water would have less to do with two Southerners being in this beautiful walled, European city and more to do with the fact that Horton and Emily were completely locked in the "Friends Zone" with absolutely no chemistry.

They apparently spent the whole day together.  We saw about 3 minutes on film. Yes, it was that boring.  I was bored just watching it.  Maybe the most "exciting" portion was when Emily told the confessional camera that she was wondering: "What's underneath [Horton's] shirt?" and was disappointed that he didn't take it off at one point in the date.

I was also a bit suspicious as both of them proclaimed how "perfect" the date was going.  To quote the Bard: "The lady doth protest too much, methinks!"  If it really were so great, neither one would have felt the need to convince themselves or us how the date was a 10 on a scale of 1 to 10.

By dinner, Emily had to psyche herself up by letting us know that the "stage was set for romance."  Sadly, Horton would only disappoint both us and Emily.  In his defense, maybe he's just out of practice.  He did admit that he hadn't been on a date in two years!  Yikes!

Horton showed more passion when he chucked the umbrella
than he did during the date...

Needless to say, Horton did not get the rose.  Emily extolled his virtues and told him how great he was, only to drop the "But" bomb on him.  It wouldn't be the first time that she pulled this trick during the episode.  She told him that they had a "great friendship foundation, but at the same time I don't think we have that romance."  Ouch!  She might as well have told him: "It's not you, it's me."  Oh wait, she kinda did.  (She told him that she didn't want him to think that he could have "done anything differently" to make her change her mind.)

The Group Date or "Since When Did The Scottish Highland Games Move to Croatia?":

Like Merida, Emily Can Be a Straight Shooter

The group date begins with Emily declaring that "Sometimes a girl just wants to see a movie."  Naturally, the Bachelorette producers somehow managed to snag a copy of Disney/Pixar's new movie: "Brave."  Not coincidentally, both Pixar and The Batchelorette fall under the "House of Mouse" (Disney corporate family) and the movie just happens to open on Friday at a theater near you!  Don't forget to buy your tickets!  ;-)

Both Emily and Doug pointed out that there were some similarities between the heroine and Emily.  I'm not a huge Arie fan, but I give him credit for this clever line: "Merida [the movie heroine] kinda got gypped--she only got three dudes!"  Funny stuff.  But as we would later learn by the end of the episode, I now wonder whether Arie came up with this line on his own or whether it was fed to him by the show producer who happens to be his ex-girlfriend...

Rumor has it that Jef With One F (2nd from Right) is pretty comfortable with knee-high socks...

After the movie, the guys got to don kilts.  Women across America cheered as the camera focused on the men stripping down.

The games themselves were a trip.  The games were complete with bagpipers and traditional highland games (archery, log toss, and stick pull)  All of the guys did pretty well.  All of the guys that is except Chris.  Chris is a pansy.  He was the only guy that couldn't hit the target during archery.  Not only could he not hit the target (he totally missed), but he also managed to look like a total dweeb doing it.  It's like he was giving a tutorial entitled: "How NOT to shoot an arrow" (i.e., put your feet together, stick your butt out, and cock your wrist at a funny angle).  It really wasn't very attractive.  Hopefully I can get a picture here for your viewing pleasure.

This is just awkward...

For some inexplicable reason, however, Emily chose to reward his pathetic-ness with the "Bravery" Award and then with the rose!  I honestly think she felt sorry for him.  I don't think I'm alone in that sentiment.

The guys were totally jealous.  Chris didn't waste much time in getting under a blanket with Emily for some "quality" time.  Then again, Sean didn't waste much time in locking lips with Emily either.  Of course, I don't really think the other guys have much to worry about.  Sean's kisses are so chaste, he might as well be kissing his sister.  (Yuck!)

Arie works his magic

Then there's Arie.  He's never been ashamed to kiss Emily.  We were treated to an extended, prolonged, lingering shot of Emily and Arie kissing whilst Emily is pinned up against the wall.  Somehow, I don't think she minded.

Jef with One F and Emily had a great conversation.  Especially after Emily called him out for waiting so long to kiss her.  Then Jef with One F made up for lost time by--kissing her.

Jef with One F also whispered to her: "Can I tell you a secret?  You give me the type of feeling that people write about.  I'm crazy about you."  I think he definitely scored some points with that one.

Chris was last.  He's not as smooth and his eyes kind of freak me out because they are so intense.  I've heard them referred to as devil eyes.  They must be devil eyes because he somehow managed to bedevil Emily into giving him the rose.  Chris beamed as she gave him the rose (and a kiss or three...).  The other guys...not so much!

Jealous much?  Arie and Jef with One F are incredulous as Chris gets the rose on the group date.

Come to think of it, I'm not sure if there was a guy on this date that Emily DIDN'T kiss.  It reminded me of a saying I heard growing up about saving your kisses to make them special.  My grandma always told me that kissing someone who'd kissed a lot of other people is kinda "like eating a piece of bread that had had all the butter licked off."  Obviously, Emily's grandma never told her that story.


The Babe (Emily) and the Big Ox (Ryan):

Take Paul Bunyan's unshaven mug and combine with the brains from Babe the Blue Ox...
....and you get Ryan

We were treated to an extended montage of Ox getting ready for his date with Emily.  We saw how his uses his razor to make triangle shapes in his beard.  We also saw how little the other guys in the house like the Ox.  Chris called him a jack-ass and called him out for taking three hours to get ready.  Ox thought that the guys in the house like him a lot.  In reality, as soon as Ox left, the guys doubled over in laughter and couldn't stop mocking him.

I'm not sure why he bothered to lather up the beard when he
wasn't going to shave it?

Ox took command behind the wheel and promptly found himself getting honked at and passed by just about every single car on the road.  He is a terrible driver!  Then they went to eat oysters.

"Beep, Beep"...Ox getting passed by another car.  My grandma drives faster than the Ox!

Dinner continued the comedic train wreck. I found myself both fascinated and yet horrified by the spectacle. Clearly, Ox isn't used to hearing people tell him no.  I just got the impression that Emily wasn't "buying" what the Ox was selling.

Then Ox pulled out his "list" of qualities that he wanted in his wife.  I loved how Emily thought that none of them hit her #1 priority (family).  Here is a smattering of some of those characteristics:

• #4 - Encourager - always "lifting [him] up and never ridiculing [him]."  That's actually tougher than you might think given that Ox says so much stuff that just begs to be mocked...
• #8 - Someone that is a Servant - because any wife of Ox's is going to have to serve him...a lot!  (Something to look forward to, ladies!)

I went ahead and added a couple that I'm sure that Ryan forgot...

• #13 - Good Cook, but not "Well Nourished."  Because Ox needs to eat well, but can't run the risk of Emily getting so big that he can't "love on her" anymore.
• #14 - Tigress.  Because heaven knows that Ox needs someone good in the sack to meet all of his manly "needs."

Emily clearly has her doubts...

Emily was not impressed with Ox's list and America collectively cheered as Emily told Ox that she didn't want to be married to Ox because she "fit into [Ox's] mold."

Here's a sampling of some of Ryan's actual quotes from the date (you can't make this stuff up!):

• "It's been a good day.  You know, spending time alone, you know, that's really what I wanted more than anything."  (Ox, since you live to show off to other people, I highly doubt that you actually wanted to be alone all day.)
• "I think it says a lot that I was chosen for this date.  I keep things fresh and new."  (I always thought that Tupperware was much better for keeping things "fresh.")
• "I look at myself every day when I wake up and say to myself: 'Who do you want to be today?'  Most men do not do that."  (You're right Ox, most men do not spend as much time looking at themselves in the mirror as you do!  Thankfully, or our nation's economy would grind to a halt!)
• "I know that I am a very good-looking guy that can get women."
• "The world is our pearl...I'm already thinking there's a pearl in there...You're the pearl."  (Covering up for his flub that the saying is actually "The world is your oyster.")
• "I'm a very safe driver.  You may not feel safe, but I don't get in accidents."  (Did anyone else notice how all this little grannies and other cars were constantly passing the Ox?)
• "Trouble, I'm definitely trouble."
• "My biggest hope for today was that we would spend time together and I would recognize and you would recognize that I could be a companion to you and you could be a companion to me."
• "You're like a trophy wife."
• "Every man should believe his wife is a trophy."  (Ox, please don't speak on my behalf.  You already make me embarrassed enough for my gender!)
• "How are you going to say you don't want to be a trophy wife and come looking like that?"

As with Horton, Emily began extolling Ox's virtues, but then dropped the "But" Bomb.  When she told Ox, she couldn't give him the rose, Ox couldn't take it.  He was "shocked" and "very surprised."  He went through many of the stages of grief--bargaining, anger, denial, acceptance--it was all there.  Emily actually teared up.  I don't know why because Ox is nobody to cry over.

Ox's exit interview was memorable.  Again, Ox's own words are too good to paraphrase (at least he didn't cry though: "She is making the wrong decision. I don't know that she will find the right guy for her here...Right now I can't imagine how shocked the guys are...we've built great friendships...Losing sucks...When you look at me you're thinking 'winner.'  That's shocking man.  Getting the ax this evening, it's definitely a blow.  You spend five minutes with me, I'll tell you that while I'm blessed with many earthly gifts, those are not worth being confident in."


He concluded with what seems like a somewhat lame and pathetic plea to the producers to not be portrayed as an "arrogant ass."  No Ox...The producers didn't do that to you--you did it all to yourself.


Rendezvous With Arie

Yes, they have chemistry...Look at the body language.  She is into him.

Arie took advantage of Ox's departure to sneak over to Emily's apartment.  He just wanted to talk make out with her.  Emily didn't seem to mind.  Before the rendezvous was over, she gave Arie the rose that had been intended for Ox.  She also talked about seeing Arie next week, telling him: "Next week's going to be fun."  Obviously, Arie is sticking around and she clearly likes him.  A lot.


The Cocktail Party/Rose Ceremony
Clearly John (aka Wolf) and Doug were on the chopping block this week.  John pulled out the funeral cards from his grandparents and Emily fell for it.  He also managed to sneak in a kiss (his first).  Is there anyone that Emily hasn't kissed at this point?

It can't be a good thing when a girl has to say: "Scooch on over here"...
...but keeps this type of barrier between the other person

Doug's time with Emily was just awkward.  Look at the body language.  She is leaning as far away from him as she possibly can.  Every time I see Doug, I think of Emily's: "Of course you did" line.  Very funny.  I'd like to think that Emily was being a little sarcastic, but maybe she wasn't.  Again, I'm just not sure what type of connection Doug and Emily have other than the fact that they are single parents.


Also Doug, here's a tip: Quit telling Emily that you don't want to go home!  She's likely to get the hint and realize that you aren't bringing much to the table.  Emily spends a lot of time trying to build up Doug's confidence.  At the end of the day, I dont' think it's going to matter.  I just don't think Doug's approach is going to be effective for him in the long run.

Doug started crying even before the Rose Ceremony...
...I hope Emily didn't see his breakdown

The Rose Ceremony came down to one rose--with Doug and John left.  Then Emily picked up the rose and split.  Double veto!  I was positive that Emily was keeping neither of them.

Emily went outside and found Chris Harrison who was talking to some "mystery lady."  Turns out the mystery lady is the Bachelorette producer who used to date Arie (I'm pretty sure...)

Chris Harrison, Emily, and the Mystery Lady

Then Emily came back in and pulled a 180 by giving both roses to Doug and John.  Everybody breathed a sigh of relief.  Especially Doug and John.


Next week: Prague.  And we get to see what the "real" story is about Arie and the Bachelor producer.

Giddyup!

PS--If you want to see a funny clip, watch to the end of the credits where you can see the guys try (and mostly fail) to mount up on the donkeys for the Highland Games.

What Have You Done For Me Lately?

Pictures of some of the things that I've been into or have been on my mind lately...

Mud Run 2012

The Fearsome Foursome: S., L., Yours Truly, and S.L. (from L --> R)

This morning, my brothers and I did the Camp Pendleton Mud Run.  It was the second year in a row for L. and me.  S. has done it about four times.  S.L. is back after taking a hiatus to serve a mission in Florida.

Pre-Race--Waiting for my brothers to show...

I swear that the race this year started about a quarter mile further back.  S. disagrees.  Like legendary Anchorman Ron Burgundy, S. and I will have to "agree to disagree then" about this point.  The race was a free-for-all at the beginning.  It was all I could do to not run people over.  I'm always amazed by how many slow people will want to cram to the front near the start line and then proceed to run at a leisurely pace!

A view of the course--if you look closely you can see runners coming into
the finish line in the lower right hand corner

S. and S.L. jumped out to a quick start while L. and I got boxed out.  I managed to catch up to S.L. after about a half a mile and we ran the next mile or mile and a half together.  Then S.L. zoomed ahead and passed S.  Except for a brief moment where we passed each other going in separate directions at the (recently dried up) lake, I wouldn't see S.L. again until I crossed the finish line.  He would go on to post an amazing time of 54:18--good for 4th place in his age group and 61st overall!!!  Great work S.L.!

S.L.

Meanwhile, I struggled on.  I kept S. in my sights and stayed about 20 yards back for the first half of the race.  I didn't want to expend the energy to catch up to him--instead I thought that I would be able to reel him in eventually.  I wasn't.  S. went on to post a time of 1:02:41.  Good for 29th out of 238 in our age group (220th overall).

S., Me, and L.

Meanwhile, L. was nowhere to be seen.  I would later learn that he had to make a quick pit stop in the Biffy's at Mile 2.  L. finally overtook me at Mile 4.  We hit that milestone in 34 minutes and I was feeling pretty good about things and happy with that time.  I thought I had an outside chance of breaking 60 minutes which is my ultimate goal for this race.  He took 20th in his age group and 165th overall out of more than 2,700 participants!

Gratuitous Shot of L.

Just past Mile 4, we hit a huge, huge downhill stretch.  Both L. and I decided to stride out and let gravity and our long legs give us an advantage going downhill.  I felt like I was flying, but L. was even faster.  He has an extra 3 inch advantage (for each leg) over me and put that to good use.  I wanted to yell out for him to be careful, but fortunately neither one of us missed a step.  L, however, was gone.  He went on to finish in 59:58!  Just barely clearing the 60 minute mark for his second straight year.

As you've probably guessed by now, I motored on but ultimately brought up the rear for our quartet.  I was happy with my race, however.  I was much stronger than last year.  I didn't bonk and it was great to feel and see improvement in my time.  I posted a time of 1:04:22--over five minutes faster than last year!  I was 35th in my age group and 270th overall.

I think I had forgotten how hard this race actually is.  The first half of the race has several long, steep uphill climbs, with little down hill.  Then just after Mile 4, you have a steep, steep downhill leg and you hit the real obstacles in earnest.  Two mudpits with a wall that you had to scale in between in this last 2 mile stretch.  Then you have the tunnel that you have to go through on hands and knees.  Everyone's knees got scraped up doing that obstacle.  Don't forget the lake.  Except this year, instead of being chest high, it was about an inch high!

The coup-de-grace of the race is the "Slippery Mountain."  It's a super steep hill about 100 yards long.  The marines sit at the top with fire hoses and just blast everyone coming up.  Water is running down the hill and there was one point in time where I could not move at all.  I  thought for an instant that I would be slipping all the way back down the hill.  It was almost unnerving thinking that I was going backwards back down the mountain!!

Then you run back down the backside of Slippery Mountain, turn the corner, and have one final mudpit to navigate.  This one, however, requires you to get down and crawl through.  I ended up "walking" on my hands and swim kicking with my legs.  I thought I was passing people--only to have some wanna-be Marine drill sergeant get in my grill and tell me how slow and pathetic I was at the progress I was making.  I think he was just trying to motivate me???

I felt liberated as I hit the home stretch.  There were crowds cheering and banners and balloons.  I could hear music from the festival area.  The last "obstacle" was big muddle puddle about 40 yards in front of the finish line.  I could see other people slowing down and trying to go around it.  I said "Screw that!" and sped up and bombed right through the middle of it!  I was wet and muddy enough that one little puddle was not going to slow me down!

I hit the finish line and started looking for my brothers.  I usually judge my effort in a race by whether I feel like puking when I'm done.  If I want to puke, I figure I ran hard enough and put a good effort in.  If I don't, I know I "saved too much for the way back."  I'm proud to report that I felt like puking in the finish chute.  I didn't puke, but I wanted to!

This was another great event put on by Camp Pendleton.  I really feel lucky for a couple reasons.  First, to be able to have such a great event practically in my back yard.  Secondly (and more importantly), to be able to do this race with 3 of my 4 brothers.  Next year, maybe we'll be able to convince N. (my youngest brother who is currently on a mission in South America) and maybe a few more family members to do it!

And to my brothers, great job!  It was so fun to do this race with you!  Go Team!

Camp Pendleton's World Famous Mud Run

The Camp Pendleton World Famous Mud Run

I'm "running" in Camp Pendleton's World Famous Mud Run tomorrow.  I put "running" in quotes because in addition to running (including up and down hills), I will be dodging blasts of water from fire hoses, fording streams, wading through mud holes, swimming across a lake, crawling through obstacles, and getting very, very muddy.

This part comes at the very beginning of the race...
....the fun is only getting started

Last year, I "trained" for the race by getting no sleep for about the entire two weeks before the race and "carbo loading" by going to Golden Spoon for a frozen yogurt the night before.  Yep, I literally skipped dinner and had a frozen yogurt the night before the race.  Little wonder that I pretty much bonked the next day.

But forgetting to train and not getting a lot of sleep are pretty much par for the course with me, so I can hardly complain that my time was so crappy.  My time (1:09:29 for the 10k course) was terrible.  I only post it here so that you know that I am not exaggerating.  My brother L. (a gifted runner if I've ever seen one) clocked a 58:01; S. was 1:01.  I swear I will be faster this year!  (even though I still haven't trained!!)

I don't know anyone in this picture.

But I did manage to do a few things right and a few things that I'll learn from.  Here are some tips if you're considering doing a mud run in your area (even though it probably won't be the Original, World Famous Mud Run at Camp Pendleton!).

• Sign up early.  Camp Pendleton's races sell out in the first few hour after they go live.  If you are checking up on me, you won't see my time (or my brothers' times) on the official web site because we bought someone else's run bib.  Technically against the rules, but still an option if you miss out on the registration.  This year, I have my own bib so you can see how bad my time really is this year!
• You will get muddy.  They have showers that you can use after the race.  Plan on spending about 5-10 minutes in the cold shower getting mud out of every crack and crevice of your shoes and clothes.  Don't wear something with pockets.  They'll just fill up with mud.  Last year, I bought matching shirts for Team "D".  They were pretty fitted and worked out great.  I made the mistake of buying some moisture wicking shorts that were a bit baggy.  Bad call.  They were pretty much falling off of my booty the whole race.  Nothing is more embarrassing than having to cross the finish line with one hand holding up your waist band!  My brothers were wiser than me and wore swim trunks.  This year, I will prove to be the wisest among us because I'll be wearing running tights!
• Nutrition.  I will eat a good dinner tonight and my typical PB Bagel tomorrow morning before the race.  No more Fro-Yo this year.
• Get Some Sleep.  I think I spent the few days before last year's race jetting off to Florida where I took about four depositions in two days, including working all night on my laptop during the red eye flight.  I remember actually falling asleep in the car as the client drove us back following the first day's worth of depositions.  The client loved me for working so hard for him.  My body rebelled when it came time for race day.   So you'd think I learned my lesson for this year right?  Wrong!  I had to pull another all-nighter last night on a project.  I have a really good friend that always gives me crap about my sleep habits.  According to my friend, the most important sleep before a race is the sleep you get two nights before the race.  I got no sleep last night.  Awesome!
• Pace Yourself.  I started off strong last year, only to wilt on the hills and dales of the military base.  Nothing is more humiliating than having two brothers smoke you as they leave you in their rear view mirror. L., who had such a great time, actually started off behind both S. and me, but just kept it going the whole time--ultimately passing us both.  On the other hand, nothing made me prouder than to cheer both of them on as they passed me. I really am lucky to have such great brothers!
• Have Fun.  The most important point of all!  I'm set to do the race with 3 of my 4 brothers tomorrow (not sure if any of my sisters are doing it??)  SL didn't do it last year because he was in Florida on a mission, but he was a high school cross country star.  If I'm not careful, I'm likely to find myself cheering on three brothers as they pass me tomorrow!  ;-)

This is after the post-race showe...ignore the tan lines and soggy, saggy, baggy shorts...
...I'm proud to be standing amongst literal and figurative giants of men!

"For the Longest Time..."

I logged onto Facebook on Monday (June 11th) to realize that exactly 20 years before, I had graduated from high school.  I still remember that day (kinda) like it was yesterday.

The Michael Jordan Jumpman Silhouette--
This is how I decorated the top of my graduation cap

I used paint to freehand an appropriate design on the top of my graduation cap.

I remember my best friend, CRV, practicing his Jimmy Connors celebration pose, and I remember driving home with my dad following the graduation ceremony on the high school football field.  Right before we got home, my dad kinda stopped the car and told me that he thought I would make a good surgeon.

I don't know why, but I will always remember the exact spot where we were at when he said that to me.  I think it made me happy to know that my dad thought I was good enough to be a doctor.

Jimmy Connors had a huge run at Wimbledon in 1991

Maybe I should have listened to him.  (Unfortunately for me (and to my brothers' collective disgust), I never took a physics course which kinda made the whole pre-med college thing impossible.)  Instead, I became a lawyer--just like my dad.  I guess that's worked out okay so far...

Anyway, even though I graduated from high school, I never actually received my high school diploma.  I think I figured out after I left the high school campus that we were supposed to stop by the office to pick it up.  Honestly, it didn't mean enough to me to make a trip back to pick it up.  For all I know, my diploma is still gathering dust in some file cabinet at SDHS.  Or maybe it got filed in the "circular file" at some point in the past 20 years.  I still don't care.

My very first blog post ("What a Difference a Decade Makes") had me looking back 10 years.  It's hard to believe its been 20 years since I passed another milestone.  I don't think of myself as old, but I certainly ain't getting any younger!

I've kinda been thinking about doing a high school post all week but held off because I couldn't find any high school pics for the post.  (I actually did find one picture from one of my senior year dances.  But, let's just say that that picture will NEVER be posted in the public domain.  The experience itself ("The Dance") was bewildering horrifying traumatic enough, without having to humiliate myself further by putting up pictures that no one needs or wants to see!)

I think that most of my high school pictures are down at my parents' house, so maybe I'll do an update if I can get down there and find and scan some suitable ones.

My 20th reunion is happening later this summer and I've been bombarded with postcards and FB messages reminding me to sign up.  I didn't go to my 10th--mostly because I was in Washington D.C. at the time--but I didn't feel like I missed out on too much.  Are any of you planning on going to your next HS Reunion?  Am I missing out by not being that excited about going?

In the meantime, I realized that I neglected to do my traditional music post this month.  I've always loved this Billy Joel song and think it's suitable enough (and appropriately nostalgic) for this topic.  Enjoy!

The Batchelorette: The Bermuda (Love) Triangle

This week, it was off to Bermuda for Emily and her crew of admirers.  We see images of Emily and Ricki cavorting about Bermuda and Emily gushes that "Bermuda has Emily written all over it."  Her enthusiasm is hard to contain and it's easy to remember that Emily is the anti-Caveman Bachelor/Bachelorette contestant.

When Emily says that she can't wait to come back to Bermuda with her future husband and that she'll likely be pushing a baby stroller, we actually believe it.  America loves Emily (and not just because she's easy on the eyes).  At the same time, I can't help but feel a twinge of guilt.  If you really like someone, the absolute last place on earth that you would want them to go to find love would be the Bachelor/Bachelorette.  Sure the contestants get wined and dined, but the show's track record in the matchmaking department is simply abysmal.

Here a few of my brief thoughts on last week's episode:


Doug's Date:
First of all, Doug totally let the guys psyche him out before the date.  Everybody was giving him crap before the date and he didn't handle it well.  I get the sense that Doug is one bad day away from going postal.  I'm sure it will make for great tv.

Arie needs to watch out a bit but Arie's "Hulk" impersonation of Doug was funny: "Doug angry. Doug smash. Doug sad."  Let's hope Doug doesn't flip out and decide to smash Arie.

Does anyone else wonder what Doug has in common with Emily?  Emily talks about how they have such a great "connection" and how they've known each other for years, but the only thing I see in common is that Doug keeps reminder Emily that they are both single parents.  Frankly, I'm not impressed.

Emily clearly was impressed.  Especially when Doug told Emily that he had started a charity.  "Of course, you did," cooed Emily.  She is impressed.

I'm still skeptical, so I did a little research and Doug's charity is apparently called: "Dollar Per Month."  My first thought was that it reminded me of a picture I saw on Facebook recently.  The picture had a female silhouette and then the caption: "I support single moms, one dollar at a time."  Terrible, I know, and tacky.  My second thought was to ask how many "dollars per month" Doug takes out of the kitty.  I' thought about putting a link in this post to Doug's charity, but since I'm not getting any dollars per month for the plug, I think I'll refrain.

At dinner, Emily worried that Doug was "too perfect."  She thought Brad was too perfect and didn't want to repeat that mistake.  When Doug confessed: "I have bad days.  I'm a normal person, like you know, nobody's perfect" I just felt creepy.

One thing that is great about Emily is that she is not afraid to ask follow-up questions.  She pushed Doug by asking him what flaws his ex-girl friends would complain about.  Doug's response: "I spend too much time with my son."  In response to Emily's question about what his last argument was about, Doug somehow found it within himself to admit: "She seemed mad at me for not washing her car enough."

Later, Doug, ever the philospher, regaled us with these words of wisdom--a window into his soul, if you will--about himself: "I'm just a guy, you know, like, I'm not a genius, but I'm not a dummy.  I'm not, like, wealthy, but I'm not poor.  I'm just Doug."

Really, Doug??!?  Emily should have just sent him packing for giving such stupid answers.  Spending too much time with your son is not a bad thing Doug.  I just get sick of you mentioning your son at every possible moment.  Enough already!  Doug must go.  Unfortunately, Emily still gave him the rose.  I guess he'll be back next week.  Maybe by then he'll have me convinced that he's perfect, but I doubt it.


Group Date: Sailing:
I must confess I was a little jealous of this date.  Not because I wish I were on the date--but because I've always wanted to learn how to sail.  The summer I graduated from law school, I had a little time on my hands once I took the bar exam.  Since I am an Eagle Scout, they asked me to go to Scout Camp at Fiesta Island with the Scouts from my ward.

I went and it was pretty fun.  They had little sailboats there that you could take out on the bay and I decided to give myself a lesson.  I did okay going out with the wind at my back.  Then I almost tipped the sailboat over trying to get back home.  I got blown a long way away from the camp and through an infestation of jelly fish.  At some point, I ended up jumping out and walking along the shore with the boat in tow.  An ignominious finish, no doubt, but I refuse to be defeated.

But I digress.  Even though neither side knew what it was doing in the boat race, somehow Arie managed to pull some race car maneuver and get the inside track to the finish.  It wasn't exactly a performance worthy of the America's Cup or even the movie "Wind", but it was enough to get to spend more time with Emily.

Charlie.  You deserve special attention for crying on the bus back to the hotel after finishing.  I know that sailing isn't a real sport like basketball, football, or even baseball.  However, I'm pretty sure that there's no crying in sailing, just like "there's no crying in baseball!"  Man up Charlie!

Arie.  Arie took advantage of his win by finding some alone time with Emily later that night to play some Beach Blanket Bingo with her.  He has a lot of confidence, but I guess that's what happens when you are dating a producer who can feed you all the lines and inside info that you need to know that you have the inside track.

Jef With One F.  I'm no expert.  But seems like that big pregnant pause when the conversation stopped and you and Emily both looked at each other was your moment.  Oops, Emily just did a confessional where she admitted that she wanted Jef with One F to kiss her.  Jef With One F is playing "the cool guy" for now.  Let's see how many more chances Emily gives him.

Ryan.  You are no Rhodes Scholar.  I can hardly listen to him brag on himself to Emily and remind her about how much "depth" there is to himself.  That's kinda like painting someone's house and then telling everybody that the paint job you did looks great--if you do say so yourself.  Maybe it does, but don't you think it'd be nicer if people kind of figured it out on their own?

Here's a great quote from Ryan: "I'm not here to impress you, but to make an impression upon you.  You know?"

No, Ryan, I don't know.  Like Emily, I have no idea where in the world that comes from or what in the heck that it means!

Here's a few more Deep Thoughts with Jack Handy Ryan:

• God designed you to be a beautiful woman, so be a beautiful woman.  You know what I mean?
• Being flirtatious is a good thing.  If you can't flirt, what can you do?
• Coming into this, I was praying not only for myself, but I was praying for you [Emily], that you would use this opportunity to really impact tons and tons of people...hold yourself to a high standard...we had to sit there and watch you and Arie kissing.  You know what I mean?  I had a little bit of a hard time with that.

I loved that Emily called Ryan out for judging her about that one.  Ryan is a tool and I'd love to see him leave, but he is so dumb that his comments are like comic gold for the show!  As long as he is on the show, I'm sure I will continue to be amazed at what comes out of his mouth.  And by "amazed", I really mean "stupefied."


Two on One Date:
Nate totally lacked confidence.  I think Emily could smell it.  Then, to top off, Nate started crying talking about how great his brother was.  If his brother is so great, why isn't his brother on the show??  No answer for that one.

In fact, neither dude was great.  They had dinner in a cave.  Totally boring.  Did I mention that Nate started crying?  Yes, he did.  It was probably the most exciting moment of the dinner date.  Unfortunately, when you start crying like that, you don't exactly give off the "confidence" vibe.  Needless to say, Nate didn't get the rose.

Catfight
At the Rose Ceremony, Chris decided that it was time to confront Doug.  About what, I'm not sure.  Chris's initial question was to demand to know why Doug thought that he was a better man for Emily.  Or something like that.  I'm sure that the producers were loving the fireworks.  Neither one came off looking well, but I thought that Chris looked worse.  I also was afraid that Doug might actually lose it and go postal.  At times I feel like he is just barely clinging on.  I think that's why Arie's jab earlier about Doug being like the Hulk was so funny.

That kinda gives us at least two (Bermuda) Love Triangles: #1 - Doug, Chris, and Emily.  #2 - Doug, Arie, and Emily.  Doug seems to be in the middle of both.  I'm just not so sure he's perfect.  It seems like Emily may be catching on as well.

The Bermuda Shorts

Jef with One F came out rocking the knee high socks and the Bermuda shorts.  I guess that's appropriate only if you're in...Bermuda.  Good thing that they were.  I'm not sure that I'm such a fan of Jef with One F.  He seems to be the type of guy that enjoys being different just to be able to say that he is different.  Jef with One F, we get it.  You're quirky.  You're different.  We knew that from your name alone.  You love playing hard to get with Emily.  I guess time will only tell whether it's just a tactic and how far it will get you.  So far, it seems to be working--Emily is buying what you're selling.

Good night and happy viewing!