You turned almost two months old today. I didn't have to go to work, so I got to hang out with you this morning. You just looked around and cooed and giggled as I held your hand and tickled your hands and feet. You still have the longest arms and legs that I can ever remember on a baby. And you're so cute that there's no danger of us sending you back!
Your mom remarked to me that you are the best baby and I kinda have to agree. I can confidently say that the past two months have been the best two months of your life! ;-)
I've had some people asking about you, so here is a photo dump of some of my favorite pics of you from the past two months!
Love,
Dad
11 days old!
This is still one of my favorite pictures of you of all time. You have big blue eyes and I think that you look a lot like your brothers and sister when they were your age.
R. has been such a good big brother to you. E. also loves to help take care of you as well. I'm so glad that your brothers and sister are so good to you. I hope that they'll be your best friends for the rest of your life.
3 Weeks Old
I love these "glamour" style shots of you and Mom. Our friend Nicole took them and I got surprised with them when I got home from work one day.
I love how your eyes are wide open in these pictures. You don't really cry hardly at all. In fact, when you were in the hospital after being born, I don't think I even remember you crying. Pretty much you eat and then go to sleep right away.
3 Weeks Old
22 Days Old
This was a really fun day. I got to hold you and you totally fell asleep big time while I was holding you in my room. I loved that you were sleeping so soundly and I don't ever get tired of holding you. I still can't believe how little you are. I'm sure that pretty soon I'll be surprised at how big you've gotten and how quickly you've done it as well!
One Month Old
Again, I love how alert you are, even at one month old. You can see how happy Mom is to be holding you and how excited E. is to be around you. E. can hardly contain herself as she is so interested in you and what you are doing.
36 Days Old
Grandma E.H. is holding you in this picture of you at 36 days old. I love this picture because it shows how happy you are!
Today
This is a picture of you earlier this morning when I woke up. It was so fun to play with you. That's my hand in the bottom left. :-)
E. came to play with us this morning too!
Later in the day, I took the older kids with their cousins to go see the new "Ice Age" movie. We can't wait until you can join in the fun!
Today was Grandpa Hancock's birthday. He was either 100 years old or 99 years old, depending on which records you believe. I personally believe he was 99 because when I was about 12 or 13, I went to the Genealogical Library in Salt Lake City with my Grandma Dyer and found Grandpa Hancock's baptismal record from the Snowflake, Arizona Stake.
The government always thought he was a year younger than he thought he was. Because of that, they gave him a hard time when he applied for Social Security when he retired. My understanding is that Grandpa Hancock ran away from home when he was a pretty young guy, so it makes sense that he might have gotten his birth year wrong. Plus, I'm thinking that as a young man on his own, it was probably helpful to be able to tell people that he was a year older than he really was.
Grandpa Hancock was a pretty interesting guy. As a young man, he enlisted in the Navy during World War II. In February 1945, his ship--the Bismarck Sea--was an aircraft carrier that was attacked and sunk by Japanese kamikaze airplanes. Grandpa Hancock managed to make it to a life raft. Here is what the Navy's magazine "Our Navy" said about his heroic actions during that battle:
Nightmare off Iwo Jima
"Tall, rugged Lynn Young Hancock, Cox. [his rank of "Coxswain"], from Challis, Idaho, somehow climbed into a life raft. He was tired. But the water was filled with tired and weakened survivors. Some were going under. Exhausted himself, Hancock left the safety of his raft to save the lives of shipmate after shipmate. When he was pulled aboard a rescue ship, he was physically weakened and in a semi-conscious condition."
I didn't know this, but in the U.S. Navy, a coxswain basically has the authority over the boat to provide for the safety of the crew. Ever since I first read this story (Grandpa Hancock never told me about it himself), I have admired Grandpa Hancock for risking his life to help save his crewmates. War can be a very terrible thing, but sometimes those extreme circumstances can bring out the best and noble in us. I'm grateful to have an example of such actions like Grandpa Hancock in my life. Grandpa Hancock, we miss you!
Today is Pioneer Day in Utah. I grew up in Southern California, but I do have a few memories of this holiday from when I was younger. I remember going to the rodeo in the old Salt Palace and I remember going to a few of the parades in downtown Salt Lake City.
I have a vague recollection of my dad running in the Des News Pioneer Day Marathon one year. He bought his shoes the night before. He said that running up hill wasn't too bad--but running downhill was just a killer. I thought about trying to run the Des News Marathon this year. It's probably a good thing I didn't, but maybe next year!
I asked one of my friends at work to name the famous holiday that happened today in Utah. The two best guesses were: "Brigham Young Day" and "Salt Water Day." As big as Pioneer Day is in Utah, I guess it's just not as well known outside the state--at least in Southern California!
What better way to celebrate summer than to spend a day at the beach. Even though I grew up in Southern California, life gets busy and I don't get a chance to enjoy the beach like I should. I had no meetings, games, or other scheduled commitments, so I was determined to take advantage and spend some time at the beach today.
First on the agenda, however, was a quick trip to Costco with the kids. My ulterior motive was to buy this bad boy. I promised the kids "brunch" and they fell for it. Next time I take the kids to eat at Costco, please remind me that I could probably feed all three kids on one slice of pizza.
This Light Speed Quick Shelter set up in about 3 minutes...
We went to North Beach first and were all set to unpack and invade the beach--as if we were camping our for a week or staking our very own claim under the Homestead Act. Then our friends, Chris and JPL, reminded us that we're neither tourists nor from Temecula--so there was no reason to settle for a crappy beach. And San Clemente has a lot of good beaches (unlike other local cities (Oceanside anyone?)), so we had plenty to choose from.
We quickly loaded back up and headed for one of my recent favorite local beaches--T Street. Once we got there and I got my new quick shelter set up, I was able to enjoy a little light reading--and a great view.
I actually got some crap from J. and our friends about the quick shelter, but I think it's a keeper. It was light, easy to set up, and easy to carry. I hate taking a bunch of crap to the beach (something that only tourists do), but I have to admit that this may be something that I have to add to my normal repertoire.
The weather was great. High 70s and low 80s. Not much of a breeze. Hardly any clouds in the sky. And although there were quite a few people at T Street, the beach was not too crowded nor was the water.
S. and R. were really excited to get me into the water with them. I held off for as long as I could, but eventually I acquiesced. The water was cool, but refreshing once I got used to it.
I enjoyed getting a chance to bodysurf, but even though I'm a much better swimmer than I used to be, it would have been nice to have fins. But I did get a couple of nice rides in.
I would be remiss, however, if I didn't give a special shout out to the middle aged, tourist boogie boarder who managed to nail me in the head at the end of one of my better rides of the day. Next time, feel free to watch where you're going lady! My neck is still smarting...She's lucky I don't know any good lawyers to take my case! ;-)
Cute Kids...Even Though They're Not Mine!
Even though you're at the beach, it's not easy chasing a bunch of kids around. One thing you might consider is how to slow them down a little bit. One of my kids (R.) was begging to get buried in the sand. I buried him and then the rest of the kids literally started lining up. Pretty soon, this is what it looked like:
Buried in the sand!
Our friend's 16-month old couldn't leave these kids alone. I think he's so used to being bossed around by the older kids, that he couldn't resist the chance to "get even." You can see him in these pictures laughing and trying to tease the older kids.
Digging with a plastic shovel at the beach is not all that relaxing...
Anyway, a good time was had by all. We are lucky to have great beaches in San Clemente. And I'm grateful that we were able to make a day of it
If you think of the summer as being June, July, and August, today marked the midpoint of the summer. We walked out of a youth fireside tonight to see this scene from the parking lot of the Stake Center. This does a fairly decent job of capturing the beauty as we enjoyed the view of Dana Point Harbor in the distance.
I couldn't help but think that as the rest of the country is melting in an unprecedented summer heat wave, we are so blessed to have moderate temperatures, cool breezes, and these types of views.
Andy Reid, Head Coach of the NFL's Philadelphia Eagles
The speaker was Andy Reid one of the most successful head football coaches in the NFL. His wife Tammy spoke with him and I was struck by what a dynamic, strong marriage the Reids had. They have been married for 31 years and I loved how Coach Reid referred to himself as the "Head Coach" and to his wife as the "Head Coach of the Head Coach."
It was a really great fireside--funny, interesting, and spiritual. Coach Reid and his wife even took questions (on any topic) from the audience for at least 45 minutes. They were so gracious. I had a couple of questions that I wanted to ask him, but I held off so that the youth would have plenty of chances.
I got a chance to thank both Coach Reid and his wife afterward and remind them that their daughter and my brother had served in the same mission in Florida. Coach Reid posed for a few pictures and even let people try on his Super Bowl Ring (from the Green Bay Packers). I may regret not having my picture taken, but if I do, it's only because I felt weird asking for a picture after a fireside while we were on the stand in the chapel.
Coach Reid and Sister Reid, in the unlikely event that you ever read my blog, thank you so much for coming to speak to us tonight!
A while back, I did a blog post for a recipe that I liked. It was something quick and easy that I called: Rice Concoction. That recipe was derived from this recipe that I developed called Dominican Rice.
I served my mission in the Dominican Republic. It is a small island country in the Caribbean and it is a beautiful country. I grew to love the people while I was a missionary. Surprisingly, I also grew to love their food.
Dominicans aren't big on spicy food. In fact, the national dish is so popular, it is called "La Bandera" which translates as "The Flag." The dish consists of red beans and rice (and chicken if you can afford it!). That's it.
I remember thinking as a new missionary that I had never eaten so much rice in my entire life because we ate it for every meal. Eventually, I developed the mindset that if I hadn't eaten rice with a meal, I hadn't eaten.
When I returned home from my mission, I was a single, starving college student. I decided to try to see if I could replicate some of the Dominican dishes that I ate since they were filling and (more importantly for me) cheap!
Dominican Rice is the culmination of those efforts. This dish is easy to make, filling, nutritious, and (perhaps surprisingly) pretty tasty. Here's how you do it (I'm making it as we speak!):
Ingredients:
Rice -- You'll need two cups of rice...
...and these
2 cups of rice -- I prefer brown rice because I think it's healthier, but it's also more expensive
1 can of Costco chicken breast
1 can of chicken broth
2 cans of beans - I am using black beans and chick peas, but you can mix it up and try other beans (or even frozen peas if you want)
1 can of salsa/enchilada sauce - to add a little kick
You'll also need a dash of salt and freshly ground pepper
Directions:
Put the rice in the rice cooker. Add 5 cups of water. (This is more than recommended, but I like my rice to be soft and sticky).
Add a dash of salt to the rice (for taste) and get the rice cooker cookin'.
Combine the canned ingredients (above) into a pan and get to simmer on the stove.
Add some freshly ground pepper to the mix. (Dominicans would not approve of the salsa or pepper (since they like bland food), but I think the recipe is better if it has a little kick to it.)
Stir the canned ingredients on the stove occasionally.
When the rice is done, dump the rice into a large mixing bowl.
Dump the beans, broth, salsa, and chicken into the mixing bowl and mix well. (You want to break up the chicken )
Let cool (because this is pretty hot) and serve.
Should serve at least four adults.
Total cooking time is probably an hour or less, but that's basically how long it takes to cook the rice in the rice cooker. On the positive side, you don't need to pay much attention once it's cooking--I did this blog post while it cooked. :-)
Ready to Eat!
Budget:
Here's the breakdown:
Rice - 2 cups - I'm not sure so I'm calling it $0.50. (You can buy rice in bulk for less than $1.00 per pound, so I think $0.50 is more than generous.)
Costco chicken breast - $1.67 per can
Chicken broth - $0.96 per can (Walmart)
Chick Peas - $0.68 per can (Walmart)
Black Beans - $0.68 per can (Walmart)
Green salsa - $0.99 per can (Ralphs)
Total: $5.48 for four servings or $1.37 per meal.
And this is way more filling than a 99 cent burrito or hamburger from some fast food joint, plus my kids really do love this stuff.
I can do a big pot of this stuff and then take it into work for lunch for the rest of the week. It stores well in a tupperware container in the fridge and re-heats easily.
After over a month of Saturdays chock full of activities and commitments, I got a Saturday where I literally had nothing on my schedule. I tried to sleep in but that's a little difficult with a crying baby next to you and kids jumping all over you.
Then I went for a run, only to have it be more like a walk/jog. At least I got a chance to get out and enjoy the first glimpse of the sun that we've had in days. (While the rest of the country has been suffocating in a heat wave, we've had cloudy days and cool temps here in SoCal. There was literally no sun on the 4th of July and it was so cold that no one wanted to go to the beach with me!)
When I got back, I held Baby M. so that J. could go run some errands and go shopping. Baby M. and I soon drifted off and I got a nice little nap while holding him.
After a family counsel, we decided to head to the pool. (The beach came in a close second. But again, we thought it might be too cold at the beach since it was only in the 70s today!).
More gratuitous family shots...
The best part of the pool was that E. asked me to come get in the water with her. This is huge for me because E. is usually very independent and a total Momma's girl.
I think that the fact that she makes me work so hard for her attention makes me appreciate it even more. It's been a big week for E. since she finally took the big step of deciding to ditch her diapers. We couldn't be more proud of her!
We came home from the pool and I got to hold Baby M. some more. I took him for a little walk around our neighborhood to calm him down and get him to sleep. It was nice to be able to spend some time with him.
I capped off my action-packed day with a trip to Walmart for some last minute groceries and supplies. I'm going to try and make some of my famous Dominican Rice tomorrow and may even do a blog post about it!
After all the scheduling madness of the past few weekends, it was nice to just have a lazy Saturday for a change.
Two years ago today, I stood on the edge of this pool and stared down the lane. I was not a good swimmer, but my brother had challenged me about four months before to do a triathlon with him at Camp Pendleton. I debated within my own head for months about whether I should (or even could) do the triathlon. I had always wanted to do a triathlon, but since I didn't know how to swim very well, I wasn't sure that I could do it.
The Camp Pendleton triathlon was a 500 yard ocean swim that had a time cut-off of for the swim portion of 30 minutes. Deep down, I wasn't sure that I could handle the indignity of starting the race and not being able to finish because I got pulled from the ocean by some life guard. I knew that if I were to have any chance at doing the triathlon, I needed to get better at swimming. And fast! There was only one month to go until the triathlon and it was put up or shut up time.
So on that Independence Day 2010, I made the decision to jump in and start swimming. My swim workouts were only 500 yards in the pool, but they were tough for me. The first few days, I took me more than 15 minutes to swim the 500 yards. In addition, I wasn't able to do the freestyle for the full distance. I was only able to do 300 yards or so before I had to flip over and do the rest with the back stroke. Pathetic, I know!
But I kept at it and kept swimming. I didn't swim on Sundays, but I was probably in that pool for at least 20 days in the month of July 2010. And I got better. =o)
Pioneer Day 2010 -- I'm sure E. thinks I look pretty funny!
Then, on July 24, 2010, I did a mini triathlon that our Stake put on in honor of Pioneer Day. I set a new record for myself in the 500 yards in the pool (11:56). I'm not trying to kid myself or you that that was fast or even a good time. It wasn't, but it felt good to see improvement and to feel better about myself.
I went on to do my first "real" triathlon at Camp Pendleton in August--one month after my fateful Independence Day decision. It was hard, but I completed the swim in time (without drowning) and finished the triathlon. And then I kept on doing triathlons.
2010 Camp Pendleton Triathlon
I promise I didn't die, even though it looks like I'm about to during the run portion here!
A lot has changed in the past two years. We have a new house and a new baby. I've made new friends and gotten to know others better. I've lost some things as well, including about 20 pounds and my fear of swimming (if I could survive the swim from the Ironman St. George, I can survive anything!). I'm in a lot better shape and I feel a lot better about myself in a lot of ways.
In short, even though life isn't perfect and I'm still far from it (perfection that is...), I feel like things are better. And they are going to continue to get better. I believe that. I can trace a lot of those positive changes in my life to that moment, two years ago today, when I stood on that pool deck and thought about jumping in. I'm so glad I decided to take the plunge!
So Happy 4th of July everybody! I hope you and your families enjoy "your" Independence Day!
I pulled up this morning to see R. hitting tennis balls against the garage door in our driveway. Funny thing is, I remember doing the exact same thing when I was his age. It really brought back fun memories and I'm glad that R. is enjoying tennis camp. (I'm horrified to say how much it cost for a week, especially after comparing prices on tennis camps with friends and family outside of Southern California!)
Happy Independence Day!
Notice how its cloudy today??? No beach for the 4th this year!
Reality Czech? Fonzi Gets Ready to Literally Jump a Shark
This week's edition of The Batchelorette took us to the Czech Republic--Prague to be exact. It also may be the moment that the venerable series finally "jumped the shark."
(for your viewing pleasure...the actual clip from Happy Days circa 1977)
Why do I think The Batch jumped the shark? How did The Batch do it? Read on, intrepid Bachelorette fan...
Prague:
Prague is beautiful...
The episode starts off with everyone from Emily, to the batchelors, to Chris Harrison regaling us with how beautiful Prague is. I'm surprised no one decided to give us that old "Batch" stand-bye line: "I'm ready to take this to the next level""I'm not looking for a type, I'm looking for a connection" "If you're looking to fall in love, Prague is the perfect place to do it."
...but so is Emily (and let's face it, that's why we watch)
Arie's Date:
Arie and Emily Stroll Hand in Hand Through Prague
Poor Arie. As he and Emily left on their date, Emily claimed that she wanted to treat the afternoon as if she were in Prague with her husband and doing the things that she and her husband wanted to do. Little did Arie suspect that Emily was literally correct.
Even though Emily has never been married, she instinctually knows how to play the game that every wife plays on her husband eventually..."I Know A Secret." You see, Emily has found out a secret about Arie. Except that Arie doesn't know that Emily knows what the secret is. The secret, of course, is that Arie had some sort of dating relationship with one of The Batch's producers. This producer (Cassie) has finally confided in Arie, but Arie doesn't know this. Arie thinks that Cassie is continuing to keep their little secret.
We see Emily leading Arie blithely down the primrose path:
"Arie, don't you think loyalty is important?"
"Arie, rub the dog for loyalty...you should do it twice, extra...that's a big one."
"Do you feel like you're really open with me?"
"Do you think you're trustworthy? [Arie foolishly takes the bait and responds:] I think I'm very trustworthy."
"I like having no secrets."
[Arie] "It's better to be almost too honest."
Arie then fessed up to having had a tattoo removed. The tattoo was of an ex's name. Emily's disappointment at this non-admission was palpable.
Gentleman, here's a little tip: If your wife starts asking a bunch of seemingly innocent questions, you should see red flags flying. Those questions are not-so-innocent! You need to figure out what the purpose behind those questions is and address that issue, stat!
The Infomercial Interlude:
"Hi, I'm Chris Harrison..."
(as if we didn't know who he was!)
Chris Harrison interrupted this episode to bring us a very important message about a Batchelorette scandal that we might have heard about or even (gasp!) read about. I want to know exactly who Chris Harrison is??? Does he think that we just sit around doctor's offices Massage Envy leafing through copies of magazines like People or Us just to read the latest gossip on the show? Please!
Umm...how did this pic get in here?
We have some shreds of dignity remaining despite the fact that we carve out two hours every Monday for this importanthitsomewhat entertaining television show.
Chris Harrison claims that Cassie took it upon herself to "inform" Emily as soon as it became obvious that Emily was developing feelings for Arie. The scuttlebutt is that Cassie has been feeding inside info to Arie. We all know that Arie has been saying all the right things all along. It makes one wonder if Cassie is perhaps at least part of the reason that Arie is hitting all the right notes.
"Some time ago, Arie had a very brief relationship with Bachelor producer Cassie Lambert..."
Unfortunately, due to Chris Harrison's complete lack of investigative reporting instincts, we are left to know who knew what and when did they know it? I know this isn't exactly Watergate, for goodness sake, but Chris Harrison's infomercial had more holes in it than the Warren Commission's Report.
Not to worry though Arie fans, Chris Harrison let us know that Arie, Emily, and Cassie had a very "honest" discussion amongst themselves and that Emily realized that it was all a "misunderstanding" and that her feelings for Arie were strong enough to overcome it.
That's the good news. The bad news is that, even though this is a so-called "reality" show, no one bothered to put this little soiree "on camera." Really, Chris? I mean, I know the chit-chat session between Emily, Arie, and Cassie was not exactly a nuclear summit between the superpowers, but don't you think at least one person might have actually thought to turn the cameras on? This is just not believable and was the first "Jump the Shark" moment in the episode...
But let's also be honest (since honesty is apparently so important to both Arie and Emily), Emily also realized that the producer is just not that hot (and apparently doesn't have a designer wardrobe or hair and makeup budget to dress and look as nice as Emily does), so there really was nothing for Emily to worry about. Emily and Arie kissed (which is seemingly the only aspect of their relationship) and made up. Fireworks ensured. Literally.
"'Cause I see sparks fly, whenever you smile...I'm captivated by you, baby, like a fireworks show..."
Name that tune!
Oh yeah, and Arie told Emily that he loved her. Or loved kissing her. I think it's pretty much the same thing to him. But at least he didn't threaten to stop "loving on her" if she got fat someday. Ox, you may be gone, but you're not forgotten!
Emily's Date With John:
Emily's date with John was pretty forgettable. I don't even want to take the time to put a picture of it. I think they painted on the John Lennon wall. (The date would have been more interesting if she had gone out with the real John Lennon.) Then they went to some fence and tried to put a lock on the fence. the lock was a symbol of eternal love or something like that.
The only problem was that they couldn't get the lock to work. Kinda like their relationship! Did I just say that out loud? Yes, I did. So did Emily (who said: "It's not a good sign."). Or maybe it was John (performance anxiety?). The point is that someone said it and we all believed it.
The best part was that John thought that the date went so well. He actually used the word "Amazing" to describe the date. (Apparently calling someone "amazing" these days is about the equivalent of saying that someone has a "really sweet spirit.") I guess he was confident of himself. At least someone was.
Oh, yeah, John let us know why he has had such a hard time opening up. It seems like he was dumped cheated on by someone in a prior relationship! As if that never happens. John, get over it. Yes, it sucks, but you're not the first one to have that happen to them, nor will you be the last.
Sean Jumps The Shark
I left the closed captions, but they really should have read: "Emileeeeeeee! Emileeeeeeee!"
After John got home, Sean decided that he didn't want to go crazy like Chris (who was constantly moaning and griping about how he hadn't gotten an one-on-one date), so Sean decided to take to the streets of Prague to find Emily.
Here's how Sean described what he was thinking: "If I run around the streets of Prague and I don't find her, I'll be absolutely devastated." Huh?
Prague is a giant city with maybe a million people or more in it. Finding Emily while you aimlessly wander the streets of it would be actually worse than finding a needle in a haystack, but you think that you would be "absolutely devastated" if you can't find it.
And that my friends, was where The Batch jumped its second shark of the evening. I honestly think that Fonzi's water-skiing caper had a better chance of success than Sean's "Mission Impossible" moment. Especially because The Batch is reality tv, right?
It's a miracle...Sean finds Emily--all alone--in some dark tunnel in Prague!
Wrong! Because Sean "found" her. And The Batch made it seem like Sean actually found her, all by herself, walking herself home from a date, in some foreign country, where they speak a foreign language, late at night, at the end of a long, dark tunnel. Umm...sure! I just don't buy it. And neither should you. (Unless that is, they had the same genius camera guy following Emily that night who was also supposed to have been filming the critical three-way discussion between Emily, Arie, and Bachelorette-producer Cassie.)
At least we didn't have Chris Harrison pop in right before Sean left on his "Mission Impossible" Quest to breathlessly announce that we were about to witness the "most dramatic" secret rendezvous in Bachelorette history!
Sean Gets His Groove On...
...Looks Like He's Been Getting Some Tips From Arie
Fortunately, Sean's mission was a success. He was rewarded with some extended lip smackage from Emily, and for the first time, it looked like Sean wasn't kissing his elderly Aunt Nellie.
The Group Date aka A Series of Unfortunate Events:
The next morning, Chris, Sean, and Doug went on the last group date. Happily for us as viewers (assuming you're into cringe-worthy moments), there were a series of unfortunate events that occurred. Let's start, in no particular order, with Chris.
I'm still not sure what Emily saw in Chris...
It's hard to really underestimate the depth of Chris' very public meltdown without letting him use his own words:
Going on a group date with Sean and Doug would be worse that going on a group date with 10 other guys.
(Obviously Chris seems to suffering from a lack of confidence, but he'd be wise not to totally broadcast his "shortcomings." I've yet to see it pay off on this show.)
"I'm pissed [about going on the group date] to be honest...I've just got a bad feeling."
(Yes, so do we Chris...kinda like that feeling when you're about to watch a train wreck as an innocent bystander.)
'The setting is very romantic and I'm going crazy..."
(Chris isn't nick-named "devil eyes" for nothing.)
"I'm at a boiling point..."
"First I'm gonna ask Emily why I didn't get a one-on-one date this week. And I want to hear an explanation."
(Chris, something tells me you won't like her explanation...)
"If I don't get that rose tonight, I'm gonna freaking out a little bit, like bad."
(I hope someone has security on speed dial.)
"I am a little upset with you [to Emily's face]."
"I don't like seeing guys come home from dates with you. It drives me crazy actually...Like I was about to go crazy yesterday."
(Clearly no one has explained the premise of the show to Chris. And when he says "Crazy," I don't think he means "Crazy like a fox." I think he means the other type of crazy--like, stalker-crazy or--even worse--postal worker crazy!)
[After Emily gave the date rose to Sean] "I am pissed off. It's insulting to hear her say that she's ready to see Sean's family, not mine. That is frickin' crazy."
"What kind of [bleep] is that? If I don't get a hometown date, I'll be scared for anybody around me."
(See, I told you so. Postal worker crazy...)
Doug:
Next, let's take Doug...
Emily leans back and away. A pained look crosses her face. The tension is evident in her
head, neck and shoulders, and her hands are out in a semi-defensive posture.
Doug has his arms crossed in a very guarded position. He actually apologizes when there
they accidentally bump knees.
In addition to his awkward body language, Doug starts off his sit-down, alone time with Emily by saying how much he doesn't want to go home and how he thought he was going home last Rose Ceremony. Huh? Doug my boy, quit reminding Emily of all the reasons she needs to cut you loose. Man up, and try to find something in common with her beside the fact that you are both single parents!
Here is a great quote from their window ledge sit-down "DTR" (Define the Relationship) talk: [Doug] "Oops sorry." [Emily] "No. You're fine. (sighs) No, Doug, don't--don't worry. Our legs are touching [like that's not a big deal--certainly nothing to apologize for]." [Doug] No, I--no, no no, it wasn't that. I just didn't--I wasn't in the way. We're good. Um...uh, we're, like, getting off track." [Emily] "That's okay."
Doug = Not Smooth. Most. Awkward. Conversation. EVER!
It was so bad that Emily even commented on how bad his body language was and that if he didn't want to get close to her now, he never would. She knew what she had to do...
If only Doug had seen it coming. Emily reassures him that she understands being a "slow mover," but then says it something totally different to be "no moving at all."
Mm...Mm. [Not] Good. Doug shows how NOT to seal the deal with a kiss.
His timing was terrible. His surprise kiss interrupted Emily mid-word. She didn't miss a beat after it finished by saying: "Thank you for that." Doug's reply: "Yep." Gross. Emily, undeterred, proceeded to walk him out and send him home.
Doug, someday you'll find the right girl...
Jef With One F:
Jef Scored Some Points By Remembering to Buy a Puppet for Little Ricki
Jef's date with Emily was pretty low key. They got puppets, went to a library, and used the puppets to re-enact their romance. It sounds a little hokey (creepy even?), but it actually was a little bit cute. And I guess if they liked it, then who am I to complain?
Nice boots Emily....
At least I didn't have to hear Jef complain about how he's been getting the short end of the stick like Chris does. The truth is that Jef is the best conversationalist by far among the remaining suitors. He is real and he and Emily seem to have the most realistic romance. Emily genuinely seems to like him and they seem to enjoy spending time together. I guess what I'm saying is that they seem like the most real couple left.
Sobbing and Bobbing With Chris:
The stress is getting to Chris...note the red eyes
Chris belatedly realized that he blew it with Emily during his group date. He then got very emotional. Chris' emotional state made John even more confident. Then the rest of the guys jumped in to keep psyching Chris out. It wasn't pretty. We saw Chris continue his death spiral of a meltdown.
Somewhere along the way, Chris developed a really annoying nervous tick. He started bobbing his head and neck around in all sorts of positions. Strangely enough, it was very bird-like in appearance--much like this macaw:
Chris then panicked and decided that he needed to interrupt the Rose Ceremony to say what was on his mind to Emily. With all due respect to Chris Harrison, it did make for a pretty dramatic moment in the Rose Ceremony.
I'm sure that everyone thought that Chris was toast. Mostly because he was so pathetic (I mean Chris himself admitted that he was going home because he had blown it) and also partly because John was so confident.
Chris Comes Back from the Brink
Turns out I was wrong and so was John. In a shocking last moment twist, Emily kept Chris and gave John the boot. Chris was ecstatic--like any good stalker would be. I just think his sense of relief may be a bit premature. He has been granted a reprieve, but certainly not a ring.
I actually think that Chris' speech worked against him and Emily picked Chris in spite of himself. Nevertheless, we will be going on "home towns" tomorrow night with Chris, Arie, Sean, and Jef with One F. Can you wait?
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